I knew when I started this blog that there was a very real chance that I would give up on it shortly after the first post went up. I lasted five and a half months before I stopped posting. Which, to be honest, was longer than I had expected myself to last. In reality, I wanted to stop posting much earlier, but forced myself to keep going. I hinted at a few things that were going on with me back in the spring last year, and those reasons were a big demotivater (is that a word?).
In april last year I had my first panic attack and the following summer was really rough on me mentally. I was struggling with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Illness Anxiety, and I was having a lot of physical symptoms along with those. I was on medication for most of the summer, and as a result spent most of it in a fog, and couldn’t bring myself to do much of anything that I had planned.
The point is, I’m back! I took some time to work on myself, attended something called Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Which helped really well. I haven’t had to take any medication since last summer. And though I still feel bouts of panic, therapy has taught me how to deal with it, and to understand that it is not going anywhere, but it’s not the end of the world.
There’s this stigma with mental illness that makes people ashamed to talk about it, and feel like they have to feel bad for needing help. Though, I feel like there’s a big movement away from this, and I want to be a part of supporting that movement and not hindering it.
Anyways! This will be my first attempt to revive this blog. It probably won’t be my last, but I have to try. It might take me a while to get out some new content, while I work on organizing my thoughts. I want to make a place where people can learn something with me, we can make things, and learn things, and teach each other, at it’ll be fun!
Best I can do is try.